Teaching a Child How to Set the Dinner Table: From Informal to Formal
The fork stands alone
On the left side of the plate
The knife protects the spoon
From the fork on the right side.

Nothing makes a child feel more important than helping out with what is usually an adult chore – setting the table. From evening meals to formal dinner settings, like Thanksgiving or Sunday meals, a child can be a big help to the chef while also building self-help knowledge and self-esteem doing something as simple as setting the table.
The art of setting the table can be taught to children as young as four or five, although care should be given when using highly prized china and stemware or sharp knives.
With a few simple steps you are instilling many tools for life success beyond the dining room:
- First build up what an important job this is and how it is an honor to be able to set a beautiful table for the family. Let them know that not everyone is entrusted with this job.
- Show your child what is needed for the table settings. This will teach them to prepare. Explain we need plates, cups, forks, knives, spoons and even napkins. This is a good time to ask them to reason out why we need them and what the consequences would be if even one thing would be left out.
- Show your child how to set the table and also show them a picture of how a set table should look. You can leave the picture with them for reference.
- Practice the above saying for a few days before setting the table for the whole family. “The fork stands alone…”. Try giving them a disposable plate and “silverware” set to practice setting the table, following the chant and the picture diagram.
- As the child gets older, or if this is an older child, explain that we place the forks in order of use starting to the left of the dinner plate. If you will be using both a salad fork and a regular fork then put the salad fork furthest from the plate. This will be the first fork used. Now place the knives in order of use to the right of the dinner plate. Next remember that spoons go to the right as well but are the furthest from the dinner plate. Drinking glasses are placed to the upper right of the dinner plate. A nicely folded dinner napkin should be placed to the left of the dinner plate. A napkin can also be placed under the forks or on top of the dinner plate. Don’t forget the dessert spoon and /or dessert fork should be placed above the dinner plate.
- On the day of the first table setting lesson set all the supplies out on the counter within reach. Later you can teach them where the pieces all are stored for easy access.
- When you finally sit down to eat, make sure you recognize a job well done. The pride of seeing the family enjoying their work will encourage them to venture into other chores with less struggles and more family spirit.
Tags: amish tables, how to teach a child, how to teach a child to set a table, informal table settings, place settings, setting dinner table




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